“Oh, you were homeschooled? Did you like it?” This is the question I hear almost every time I tell someone I was homeschooled. I never know how to approach answering this question in the moment, because homeschooling in and of itself is not bad. But no, I did not like it. 

From pre-school to junior year of high school, I was homeschooled. No, I did not do school in my pajamas. There are many different types of people in the homeschool community in South Jersey, and the picture you may have in your head is accurate for some of us. For me, my mom tried to make sure I was hitting every mark that other kids were hitting. Her biggest goal was to give me structure and socialization. 

I was a part of a sizable homeschool group that met on Fridays for in-person extracurricular classes. In the early days, I took a cooking class, a drawing class, and an American Girl Doll class. I also did competitive soccer, basketball, and cheerleading through the homeschool groups. It looked very much like your experience with sports did when you were in grade school. We also went on several field trips where I got to see a plane that used to land on the U.S.S Forrestal, a ship my Grandpa used to be on when he served. 

At home, though, when I had to do my actual schoolwork, I was not happy. I often spent my days trying to get my mom to understand that I wasn’t being lazy and I genuinely did not understand the content. She’d finally get frustrated enough with me that she gave up and would call for backup; my dad.

My dad is an accountant at a large company and owns a tax business. If anyone could help me understand math, it would be him, right? Sometimes he did help. But most of the time, something just wasn’t clicking. I would sit at the dinner table trying not to think about the math homework and history homework I would have to do after. We would sit at the dining room table under the warm, dim glow of the overhead light. I remember staring at the numbers and letters on the paper and watching my tears blur the ink on the page. I still wasn’t getting it, and I knew they thought I was being lazy. 

I remember one particular field trip to a peach plantation where the instructor thought it would be “fun” to bring the kids into the old school room to test us on our math skills. I watched the other kids race to finish their math problems and get excited to raise their hands. They beamed with pride when the instructor said “That’s right! Very good!” I stared at my blank chalkboard and tried to hold back tears.

I spent most of grade school thinking I wasn’t good at school, or that I was lazy. “You’re smart you just aren’t applying yourself,” my mom would say. When in reality, I was giving every last drop of my energy into trying to understand the content. 

Fast-forward to my junior year of high school when I started taking classes with real teachers, in real classrooms. I took a high school English class with a retired public school teacher who was now teaching upper-level classes to homeschooled students whose parents hit their limit of teaching abilities. 

98%. What? I got 98% on a grammar test.

Then I started taking classes at Rowan College in Burlington County (RCBC, formerly BCC). I was doing well in math, and my friends in the class were coming to me for help. I was enjoying my math class, and understanding the content. 

I learn better around my peers. As hard as my mother tried, she wasn’t a teacher. I needed real teachers who knew the content with their eyes closed, not my mom who was reading words on a page. This was the breaking point. I went from being entirely against going to college, to only doing one semester at RCBC before scheduling an advising session to figure out how to transfer my credits to Rowan University. 

Rowan is where I thrived. I’ve gotten A’s in all my classes except for one B and my U.S. Literature class (I don’t talk about that one). Lately, I’ve considered myself an academic. I’m a double major in Sports Communication & Media and Journalism and have concentrations in Public Relations & Advertising, and Sports Journalism. I have a 3.6 GPA (that darn Lit class) which I’m looking to bring up this semester. I’ve been honor roll every semester since transferring here, and in my free time, I study Philosophy. I went from being the “lazy” kid who “just wasn’t applying myself,” to thriving. 

When I found The Whit, everything turned around. I always loved writing, but with journalism, I found my passion. I found a community where I was welcome and supported. Now, I’m the Arts & Entertainment Editor, and I have loved every second of working with all my writers.

I know many kids who didn’t do well in public school or college but did better with one-on-one learning with their parents. I just wasn’t that kid. That just wasn’t my story. I have always been highly driven and determined, and “lazy” will never be a word to describe me, as a student or as an employee. 

If you had a similar experience, know that you weren’t lazy. It was your environment. Believe in yourself enough to keep going. If you’re struggling academically, meet with an advisor or with your professors. I have found most of them are genuinely here to help you and want to see you succeed.

I am looking forward to graduating with two Bachelor of Arts Degrees, and I can’t wait to see all of you cross that stage one day too.