Christmas used to be my favorite day of the year because I could always look forward to “Santa Claus” gifting me with everything I wanted and more. During my childhood years, Santa gifted me toys. When my age hit the double digits, he gifted me electronics (phones, tablets, iPods, laptops, gaming systems). From my teenage years to my adult years, Santa gifted me with clothes, shoes, blankets, perfumes, and all materialistic things.

But this year, I am Santa. 

I hold in my hands, the childhoods of my two children. It is up to me, and only me, to ensure that Christmas will always be one of the happiest days of their lives. I look forward to holidays in a different way now. I no longer expect to be spoiled and instead, do the spoiling myself.

I’ve always wanted to spoil my kids with everything they’ve ever wanted. But that is getting difficult to do while I am constantly calling out of work to care for them while they are sick or to complete school assignments. As my paychecks got lighter and lighter, I decided to start my Christmas shopping early, in October. This way, I didn’t have to worry about how I would be able to afford their gifts this year. Each month, I have to pay for diapers, wipes, food, bills, and gas, and leave room for any curve balls that life decides to throw at my pockets. So, it would have been impractical for me to try and get all the gifts at once. Little by little, every week, I’d buy a few toys. By the time Thanksgiving came, I had already been finished with all of my shopping. 

With winter break approaching, I’m looking forward to spending quality time with my kids and starting some new traditions. I’m ready for cookie decorating, watching Christmas movies, going out to see Christmas lights, and drinking hot chocolate. 

Christmas time has never felt so amazing. Being Santa puts me in charge of everything. And even with my busy schedule, I can’t find one thing to complain about with this new title. Seeing the joy and excitement on my kid’s faces as they open each gift, that I worked extremely hard for, is worth it all.

On Easter, I am the Easter bunny, hiding mystery eggs and filling baskets. On Halloween, I am coordinating matching costumes. On the 4th of July, I light the fireworks. On Valentine’s Day, I don’t even celebrate how I used to, because my son’s birthday is the following day and I am most likely preparing or celebrating. Although I am the one who makes all of the magic happen, the experience never feels any less exciting.

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